He's right too.
The current requirements for getting to the top of the charts:
Dress like a hooker
Have a rap sheet
Programmed beats - must go 'doof, doof, doof' all the time, non-stop
Snare must sound like it's 'played' on a coffee tin
Bass must drown out all other sound when it's played
Must have 'featuring...' in the title of the track
Song must contain offensive lyrics written by someone with the mentality of a 12 year old
Song must be interspersed with stupid sound effects - 'Yo Bro' or similar 'words'
Dancers for the video that probably ARE hookers
Stupid makeup
No actual ability with a musical instrument of any description - this is probably the single most important requirement
Artwork for the single or album must contain one of the following - loads of cheap jewellery, flashy cars, bundles of monopoly money and scantily clad women. Gold dental fillings are a bonus.
Oh yes before I forget you don't have to be able to actually sing - you can just talk nonstop while some simplistic plink plonk type melody plays monotonously in the background along with aforementioned beats. And if you can't talk in key then there's Autotune to fix the problem.
The current requirements for getting to the top of the charts:
Dress like a hooker
Have a rap sheet
Programmed beats - must go 'doof, doof, doof' all the time, non-stop
Snare must sound like it's 'played' on a coffee tin
Bass must drown out all other sound when it's played
Must have 'featuring...' in the title of the track
Song must contain offensive lyrics written by someone with the mentality of a 12 year old
Song must be interspersed with stupid sound effects - 'Yo Bro' or similar 'words'
Dancers for the video that probably ARE hookers
Stupid makeup
No actual ability with a musical instrument of any description - this is probably the single most important requirement
Artwork for the single or album must contain one of the following - loads of cheap jewellery, flashy cars, bundles of monopoly money and scantily clad women. Gold dental fillings are a bonus.
Oh yes before I forget you don't have to be able to actually sing - you can just talk nonstop while some simplistic plink plonk type melody plays monotonously in the background along with aforementioned beats. And if you can't talk in key then there's Autotune to fix the problem.
'The purpose of life is a life of purpose' - Athena Orchard.